The Relief of Breathing {Open, Outlaws}

[Thea Linnet]

Thea was bored. And sadly it had been a common occurrence lately. The castle was eerily quite most of the time and the Thea had managed to miss meeting every guest that now lived there. Despite the hours she'd spent wandering the winding corridors, she'd never seen one of them. But ironically, cruelly, she'd passed Roe a number of times.
That was an awkward situation to deal in. Since Thea, Isabella and Roe spent a great deal of time in the castle, they were all stepping carefully to avoid speaking with one another. Thea wanted the whole fiasco to be over, but life was never that nice. With the lack of friends, eerie silence and trying to avoid Isabella, Thea felt as if she couldn't breathe. So she saddled up her horse and took off for Sherwood.
It was a pleasant enough trip with few complications and soon Thea found herself in the cool, green shade of Sherwood. She dismounted in a clearing and tied the reins to a branch. A spot of sunlight shot down from between the trees and illuminated a bright spot where Thea sat down and drank in the light.
A different kind of silence filled the area, a contented one. If it could be called silence; birds sang, insects buzzed and in the distance she could hear a brook bubbling. She listened to the sounds build and soften in waves that matched the light breeze. For what seemed like the first time in weeks, Thea inhaled deeply and sighed out with absolute serenity.

[Roe]

Thea was clearly enjoying his most favorite part of Sherwood Forest. He could tell, at a moderate distance, by her body language, that she was at last relaxing a bit. Every time that he had run across her on the castle he could sense the tenseness that she was feeling. Roe knew that the 2 women had a serious blockage between them, and he had known better than to get involved, because he would have only attracted Isabella's fire at that point.

Roe looked at it as his responsibility, not only to guard people within the castle walls, but on the outside as well. So, when she had left the confines of Nottingham, he had followed on Sherfore at a safe distance, and` she had not been a difficult one to track through Sherwood. As she had stopped to admire the tranquility and the scenery it was easy for him to make up distance between them. "I see that you also appreciate the finer points of my favorite spot in Sherwood Lady Thinnet."

When he had had to get away from Locksley Manor, or he needed a rest from his duties with the carpenter in Locksley, this was where he had escaped to. He could practice his bowmanship, fish in the nearby stream, or simply take a nap. It just was like it was a whole separate world. He had even brought his first girlfriend up here, when he did not want to be disturbed. It was strange, he thought to himself, of the places and things, that you forget about, especially since he had so many happy memories of this place.

[Thea Linnet]

Thea hadn't heard Roe's approach, so she jumped when she heard his voice. Eyes still closed, she fell back into the grass and sighed. She didn't want to see the tenseness that could have been in his face, nor did she was to witness the anger or repulsion he might hold to her. And she certainly didn't want to make the situation any worse than it already was.
"It is wonderful here. But how did you find me?" And why, she wanted to ask, but bit back that question. She'd save it for later.
In the sunny daylight, something occurred to her that made her smile. "This is the first time we've talked that hasn't involved a crisis and you coming to my aid." She cracked open one eye at looked up at the giant man standing above her.
"Come and sit, Roe. Unless you're leaving now, I should think deserve a rest." She sighed again and rolled onto her stomach. "I think we all do." She toyed with the grass, pulling it out and making a knotted chain like she used to do in her childhood.

[Roe]

Roe chuckled a bit when she jumped, obviously surprised at his presence. "I didn't think that a man could sneak up on you, my lady." He got the sudden feeling that she did not want to look at him for some reason. He smiled, "Is there something about this face that you did not want to look on, perhaps? Yes .... it was always that way here .... it was my escape from the real world. Here I could pretend to be a great nobleman, a fine bowman, or even a king .... before I went back to the real world, that is."

Such questions, he thought to himself. She must think I'm capable of very little on my own. "How did I find you, you ask? That is quite easy. I just followed you, at a discreet distance, as soon as you left the walls, after all I'm not just responsible for the safety of nobles like yourself when you're inside the walls, but when you're outside as well. And once you were in Sherwood I no longer had to keep you in sight .... your trail was easy enough to follow. And yes, I know of view places more beautiful of its own accord, and of course you add something to it as well."

He thought to himself that her comment was quite true. "Yes, I suppose I wasn't coming directly to your aid, but I was attempting some measures so I wouldn't have to come to her aid. Well .... there isn't anyone else in quite some distance ... so I guess its as safe as it can be, unless one of Robin's men happen upon us."

Roe sat down on the ground next to her, and took off his earthen-shaded cloak. Next he took off the outer vest of his knight's uniform, and pulled the two sheaths that held his 2 swords over his head and setthem on the ground next to him. "I still have my long-knives, and its a lot more comfortable sitting on the ground without those on my back." Roe plucked the stem from some growing hay and stuck it in his mouth and leaned back on his 2 hands in a fairly comfortable position, leaning his head back, trying to absorb the warmth of the sun.

[Thea Linnet]

"You always sneak up on me," Thea informed Roe sternly, but with a smile. "It's nice to know someone's looking out for me, though I might not need it this time. I feel as though I'm taking you from your other duties. Really, Roe, you shouldn't worry, or consider me your responsibility." Though I wish you wouldn't leave, she added mentally.

Thea tried to fight the heat that came to her face when he said she added to the meadow. "You know, I don't know why I fight it anymore! You know as well as I do that you're capable of making me blush with a single word. It's annoying!" She exclaimed, throwing her hands in the air then letting them fall onto the soft grass.

Thea watched as he removed his layers and suddenly everything became more human to her. With him just sitting beside her in a place few people could find them, she didn't feel inferior or awkward. When he lowered the swords, she touch the cool metal and giggled.
"It's very strange to see you without them. I was beginning to wonder if you ever took them off. In fact, I had figured you slept with them still attached." She gasped and covered her mouth quickly, a blush creeping up her neck. "Not that I...you know...think about you sleeping." She gave a great sigh and rolled her eyes at him.
"How do I manage to constantly make a fool of myself around you, Roe?" Looking back at the swords, a curiosity ignited a glint in her eye.
"You know..." she started while letting her fingers slid along the cool metal. "I've never actually held a sword, let alone fight with one. And if you're going to stop coming to my aid, I should learn how to fight. Don't you think, Sir Rober'?" She looked over at him pleadingly.

[Roe]

Roe looked at her and shrugged. "Its not intentional, but you know, since I'm often following you, there's no place to come up on you except from the rear. Ah, with our recent history I think I look on it as one of my many duties to keep you safe. Also,as long as you are staying at the castle your safety is a primary concern. You are one of my duties, and quite a lovely one at that. Its not that I worry, but your safety, I'm afraid is something that I always have to consider."

He laughed with a broad and wide smile, showing a full set of teeth. "Would you rather, then, my lady, that I not annoy you any further, and one wonders what exactly you are fighting, and how hard," as looked up into her eyes with dark and deep-set ones.

"Well .... it is strange for me as well. When I was off for 15 years fighting in small wars and big ones they were never more than a foot away. Now, though, I am at home, and I'm actually much more at home with a re-curved bow. However, I must say, those 2 broadswords can be quite intimidating." He laughed loudly once again. "I wouldn't worry about it too much. I do sleep after all .... just a few hours at a time ... but I do sleep. You shouldn't think so negatively of yourself. I almost never think of you as foolish .... sometimes enthusiastic and aggressive, but never foolish."

He thought about her request for a few moments. "Well, first-off, I would never refuse to come to your aid. All that you would have to do is call and I would come. However, it is wise to be prepared. I gather that you would want some lessons .... I'll have a sword forged for you, by weight, length, and balance that are more attuned to you, an one of these clumsy things I wield. Do you want to learn? And by the way, away from the castle, my friends all call me Roe."

[Thea Linnet]

"I would be honoured if you taught me how to fight." She said with a wide smile. "But not now, not on such a lovely day. So, tell me Roe, what is new at the castle. Amazingly, I've managed to unintentionally avoid almost every inhabitant of the place. There must be something to say."

The sun was a blazing directly overhead and Thea drank in its warmth happily. Though, with all the layers she had, it was becoming a bit much. So she untied the vest at her waist and laid it on the ground, her boots soon following. Tying her hair up with the leather rope from her vest she instantly felt cool. "Much better," she muttered then fell back into the grass, her hands resting under her head. The crickets' buzzing filled the silence that had fallen over them.

"What of Isabella?" she ventured carefully.

[Roe]

Roe was just preparing to get back up on his feet when she said that she wanted lessons, but not on suh a beautiful day. "As you wish .... it is a lovely day, other than the unsavory caracter that you've run into here, eh?," he laughed. "I would think, having seen your reactions in the past that you will indeed be a quick study. In the castle .... not a great deal. Of course Robin and his other men broke up and thoroughly destroyed Prince John's wedding, and I've met a couple of the nobles who were visiting from London. Oh, by the way, Robin pretty much cleaned the nobles out of their jewelry, while I made sure that all of my guards were on the other side of the castle. They did want any help from the local yokels anyway, the fools," he laughed.

"It would be difficult to improve your appearance, but as long as you are more comfortable, that's what matters most." Roe just sat there, with his knees brought up to his chest, taking in all of the surrounding scenery of nature, including Thea.

"What of Isabella?" she asked.

He wondered exactly why she should be concerned about Isabella. "That's something for Isabella to decide. When her mind gets in these states she wo't listen to the facts or reason. She will eventually come around to common sense, but by that time I will have moved on. We will eventually be friends again, but that will be somewhere down the road i expect. It ventured carefully. Its all the better for her ... she can do better by herself, as well as you can, rather than to settle for the likes of me," he laughed.

[Thea Linnet]

Thea couldn't help but smile when Roe spoke of Robin Hood. "I knew you were on his side. Always knew..."

"Its all the better for her ... she can do better by herself, as well as you can, rather than to settle for the likes of me," Thea sat up and hit his arm.

"Don't say that. Despite what you think of yourself, you are actually a desirable man. Are you honestly so sure that no one will ever love you? Why do you think like that? I mean, if you were my age and impulsive and moody as I am, I could understand. But you're a grown man, and one I think thinks far too poorly of himself."

Thea thought about Isabella and groaned. She hadn't done anything to help that situation, even though she should have. But she hadn't seen the woman at all lately. Oh well, she thought.

"Don't tell me that the Crusades makes you think like that. I don't know if I could ever believe my father thought like that. He was never hard on himself. Until my mother fell ill, then he blamed himself. Foolish, really, since it was my fault..." she trailed off, her voice becoming weak. With a shake of her head, she apologized to Roe.

"You don't want to hear about that," she muttered, bowing her head and shifted her attention to the flowers just to her right.

[Roe]

Roe could see that she responded with a smile when he talked of Prince John and the outlaws. "You always knew? .... and exactly how would you know that .... outside of the fact that this is all home ground for me, eh?," he said with a smile of his own.

Roe rubbed his shoulder in mock pain. "My, my, aren't we the violent one now. Oh .... is that so .... and just how desirable do you find me," he laughed sarcastically. "Or is it that you find older men attractive. Honestly, though, I am hopeful that nobody will ever love me again, and be disappointed. Really? Actually, I thought thinking to highly of myself was the problem."

"Don't minimize what effect the Crusades or any war can have on a man. After enduring it an ordinary man may think that every shadow and every unexplained sound at night is a Saracen, waiting to slit his throat. I was at the Siege of Jerusalem in '87, where we defended the city against 200,000 Saracens, and each of us had to be expected to kill at least 10 times our number. I killed fathers, and sons of fathers, ad hopefully not too many woman and children. What right have I to eek a loving wife and family, wen I removed the prospect of such for so many, eh?,"

Suddenly he turned to her and said, "Come, tell me your story, we have heard enough of mine. Besides, it may do you some good for you to get it off your conscience."

[Thea Linnet]

"M-my story?" she asked warily. She hesitated for a moment then brought her knees up to her chest much like how Roe was sitting.
"My father, David, is the Sheriff's brother and left his family as soon as he was able. Apparently he'd been the bad seed of the children. He was about sixteen when he started to trade and met my mother in Ireland when he was nineteen and brought her home to be his wife. While he started small, he soon grew to be a great merchant, and a wealthy one at that. His trade is what's keeping Birmingham alive now, though Runner's taking over the business.

"Dad stopped trading when I was born and stayed close to home until I was seven. At that point I only ever saw him twice a year. In a way, I never really got to know him. I mean, he is my father, but when I was old enough to appreciate my family, he wasn't around. That's not to say I don't love him, because I do...did. It's just not the same love I had for my mother.

Now she was amazing," a peaceful smile lit up Thea's face as she spoke of the woman. "Imagine me, but taller and much louder. She was always up doing something and it usually took a few of us to get her to sit still. I guess I got that from her. But I've never met someone I admired as much her. And she taught me almost everything I know. Even the rather colourful language I picked up from her." She smirked up at Roe and wondered if he had ever actually heard her less than polite language.
"We lived well, as you might have guessed from the house. I'll admit I was spoiled, since as a child I never really went without things. But I think, I hope, I've turned out well. Even though we always had enough, I was always taught the value of what we had. Whenever dad did come home, he would be sure to tell me what my things were worth. He also taught me the value of work. You see, he had to earn everything from scratch after he left his family. He wanted me to learn that I can't just expect things to come to me. And I'm glad he did. I don't think I'll ever truly understand the value of somethings just because of how I was brought up, but I'm not ignorant about hard work."

Now was the harder part. She squeezed her eyes shut and rubbed them, just as an excuse for time. Slowly, she started. "A month and a half ago now, my mom was out shopping, as usual. It was a cool day and, also as usual, she hadn't dressed for the weather. She'd been out there for hours and it's taken me the better part of an hour to actually get her inside. Once she was though, she was restless, pacing around, getting hot then chilled. I thought it was just a small thing, nothing to be worried about, so I made sure she was comfortable and let her rest. But by the end of the week she still hadn't gotten better. Dad came home then and he and Runner dropped everything to help her. Physicians from all over came to our aid, but nothing helped. And I was shut out from it all. Apparently I was too young to witness whatever was happening." Thea scowled despite herself, but continued.
"Dad sent word to his brother, begging him for the best physician in Nottingham and never got a reply. She...well...she passed away two days after. I'll always blame myself for it too. And my father left for the Holy Lands without a word to anyone, except a note telling me to got to Nottingham and live my my uncle until his return."

Thea buried her head in the soft grass and sighed. It was still hard, but was getting easier with each telling. The wound that had felt so fresh a few weeks ago was starting to heal. Slowly, but it was.

"I guess you know the rest," she said with a small smile. "And that's my story. The whole thing," she groaned and looked up at Roe to judge his reaction. She suspected he would react at all; her story must be similar to many others he'd heard, but she wanted him to think differently of it. He'd told her that he'd sent massages to families of the men killed in the Holy Land, and maybe he understood her loss.

[Roe]

Thea appeared to be hesitant and unsure about talking about herself and her story, but as she got into it, she got more comfortable. Roe made sure that he nodded affirmatively at the appropriate times to both encourage her and to indicate that he was paying close attention to what she was having to say. It was also useful in filling in some holes about their High Sheriff's past as well.

Of course in explaining some points about her familiy life and characteristics of its members, it explained much about Thea as well. She was obviously very similar to her mother but had a closeness and affinity for her father, as the result of his long absences. It was easy to see how a very independent streak could have been encouraged as well, including how she could have developed a tendency to getting whatever she wanted when she wanted it.

It was easy to tell how she felt about her mother, in that her entire personality seemed to change, in a positive way when she spoke of her. "That is difficult to believe .... someone more vocal than you, although I could see how it could take several people to hold you down," he chuckled. "That is quite true, often people do not understand the value of things, people, or money, and don't put the right emphasis on work as a result."

Then she went into, what was for her, the hard part of her story. He knew this by the way he could tell she was tensing up. The loss of her parents, especially her mother were quite sad and he told her so. "In many ways, because I saw so much of it, and caused so much of it, I was de-sensitized to loss. I found, though, that different people reacted to the kind of loss that you endured in different ways. Some it simply destroyed, and they could no longer function. Others, it simply embittered them towards everyone and everything. Some, on the other hand, looked death, brutal as it was, as another part of life. I think, all things considered, that you have handled it as well and constructively as you could have imagined. You should be quite proud of yourself and what you've accomplished. I expect that your parents would have been."

[Thea Linnet]

Thea smiled at Roe gratefully. "Thanks," she said quietly. She looked up to the tops of the trees with a sigh. "I think they would have been too."

A contented silence filled the meadow, each of its members wrapped in their own thoughts. Thea's were of her family and her house. She thought of the grassy patch a few yards from her houses where her mother now was. She thought of the endless miles of sand that her father could be in. But her thoughts were sad, not fully at least. Of course she'd never be able to think of them without some feeling of loss, but now she didn't think of the loss. Now she thought more of the wonderful times she had with her mother and father. "Thank you," she said again, barely more than a whisper. Thea knew that somehow Roe had helped her with this too.

She cast a sideways glance at him, trying to figure out what he was thinking of, but knew she would never know. Despite how much she knew about Roe, he always seemed to be thinking of much more than she would have thought. Part of him would always remain a mystery to her, since she suspected he never really opened up to anyone fully. She, however, you be an open book for anyone to read, like she always had been.

The silence stayed until Thea, being Thea, had a mood swing (for the better) and stood quickly.
"I think I'll take you up on those lessons, Roe." She offered him her hand to pull him up, then had to laugh. She wondered if he would take it, because if he did it was probably the first time Thea had helped him since they met.

[Roe]

Roe was happy that he had apparently said the right things. Besides that, Thea appeared to be at peace with what had happened to her parents, and perhaps more importantly, what she had done and how she had ended up since those tragic events.

Roe himself thought himself to be quite different. He always ried to portray an outward calmness, which masked and covered-up significant turmoil, in which Roe was rarely at peace or rest over anything that he'd ever done or participated in. Still, what it did was bring back memories of more peaceful and tranquil times.

Roe gladly took the hand; he was rarely offered, and slowly but steadily he rose, towering over her once more. He walked over to his horse and pulled out a sword. "I almost always carry an extra, and this shield is just part of the regalia, but in battle I rarely used it. I prefer to use 2 swords with my shield on my back if at all. It protects me some from flying arrows. However, you'll probably be more comfortable with the one sword. Now, remember, everyone has advantages. Yours is being and being a smaller target, plus the fact that you need less space to operate in."

"Lets begin." Quickly he recognized how tentative and therefore slow and late she was with her movements. "You must be decisive, though, if you want to make use of your advantages." He extended her srord-hand out farther with his right-hand sword, used his left to pry the armor away from the body, and moved his body to her iside, with his right-hand sword at her neck, as his chest was up against hers. .... "See."

[Thea Linnet]

"Ah," was all she managed when Roe held his sword against her neck. "Well," she teased, "that's hardly fair." She quickly ducked out from his swords and put a good distance between herself and Roe. The sword felt strange in her hand, it felt too heavy and too light at the same time. From looking a Roe's two swords, she'd imagined that this one would weight a lot, but it was surprising light, but it was heavier than it look, oddly enough. Her arm bounced a bit as she tried to get a feel for the weapon. She took small steps to mirror his movements so she had less of a disadvantage.

She tried to remember how Runner used to fight with the wooden swords. He had been trained in France to use one and like to show little Thea how to fight. With a determined smirk, Thea swung the blade around her hand and brandished it at Roe. Taking a small step toward him, she raised the sword above her head and brought it down in an arc to Roe.